by Douglas Young<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Though slightly nervous, Radford McGinniss caught himself smiling en route to a fifteenth annual high\u00a0school reunion thrown at a classmate\u2019s home Saturday evening. Despite his four years at Theophilus Holmes High being his most miserable, littered with the usual adolescent angst and aggravated by a severe strain of shyness, Radford still managed to make some friends and many friendly acquaintances there. By his thirties, he concluded that the fault of his terrible teens lay not with constipated teachers or bullying educrats, but his own failure to summon the courage to confront pronounced personal problems, especially his shyness.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Going away to college had been liberating, and then earning a law degree and becoming a successful small-town attorney helped conquer or at least manage many of his deepest insecurities. Though still somewhat nervous, especially with women, he now felt far more confident facing his classmates. Time had also pushed his few happy high school hijinks to the forefront of his memories while the plethora of humiliating episodes and regrets had begun to fade.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Within five minutes of walking into Belle Boyd\u2019s back yard party centered around a large pool, the hour\u2019s drive to his hometown was well worth it since several pretty ladies greeted him with a hug, something he had never received from a classmate. He was also fascinated to learn the biographies of so many folks not seen in a decade and a half. Most had done well, and they were impressed and plenty surprised that the quiet boy in the back of the classroom had become an attorney with a thriving law practice.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Radford was so engrossed conversing with a slew of the fifty or so guests that he was taken aback when his watch revealed it was already 9 p.m. Looking for any buddies he may have missed, a loud feminine voice bellowed, \u201cRadford McGinniss!\u201d Turning around, he beheld the exuberantly fetching face and striking figure of Camellia Fitzsimmons, his boyhood\u2019s biggest secret crush. Tall, busty, flirty, and more than a tad smart-mouthed, he had long envied how commandingly confident she appeared in any situation. In high school, he was slightly scared of every girl, but Camellia\u2019s feisty spirit and love of embarrassing folks made her the least approachable of all.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Despite looking attractive as ever in her tight jeans and form-fitting, bright yellow shirt, the tanned, dark-haired Camellia had neither been on the homecoming court, a cheerleader, nor even a majorette. She never hung out with the school\u2019s pretty girls since they held her in thinly-concealed contempt for openly displaying what they saw as distinctly unladylike conduct \u2014 talking back to teachers, speaking crudely, smoking cigarettes and marijuana, and having sex with many guys, especially the much-coveted stars of the football team. Miss Fitzsimmons returned the alpha females\u2019 disdain in the most effective ways possible, alternately ignoring or laughing at them. Most all her friends were guys anyway.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Awestruck that his ultimate fantasy girl shouted his name and now beckoned him to her, a wide-eyed, slightly slack-jawed Mr. McGinniss slowly but excitedly moved toward her standing by the pool. He duly glanced at his waist to make sure his shirttail was tucked in and quickly ran his hand through his hair.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Surprising himself, he marveled aloud, \u201cWow. You\u2019re even more gorgeous now than you were in high school.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, you just earned yourself a kiss, Mr. Radford,\u201d she replied. \u201cAnd look who\u2019s still got hisself all that great big, bushy, beautiful blonde hair,\u201d she exclaimed before embracing him, pecking his cheek, and running her hands over his scalp.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cMiss Camellia, if you\u2019d a-done this in school, I\u2019d a-been too thrilled to sleep tonight \u2013 and I still might not,\u201d he blurted before he could stop himself.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, you shoulda\u2019 told me, babe,\u201d she exclaimed with her hands on her hips. \u201cAnd if I\u2019d a-known you was gon\u2019 be some hifalutin\u2019 lawyer, I wouldn\u2019t have wasted so much time with all those jocks. Look at \u2019em now.\u201d She chuckled waving her hand toward the crowd. \u201cFat, already balding, selling used cars, and never even left town.\u201d Thankful for the loud music and chatter, Radford hoped no one else heard her.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, you\u2019re mighty kind to me, Miss Camellia,\u201d he replied, \u201cbut, as Senator Sam Ervin said, \u2018I\u2019m just a plain ol\u2019 country lawyer,\u2019 and one who only ended up an hour away, and in a much smaller town at that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cBut I heard you went way out of town to college and law school, and the point is that you got outta\u2019 here and really made something of yourself,\u201d she declared, poking her index finger into his chest.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Still stunned, the now thoroughly buzzed teetotaler tried to fathom what was happening. Ever awkward receiving compliments, he looked down and stammered, \u201cThat\u2019s sure super sweet of you. Keep talking like that and you\u2019re liable to find this lawyer all swimmy-headed and totally tongue-tied. Seriously, many thanks, Camellia.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Flashing a toothy grin that became a subtle smile, she leaned closer, looked deep into his eyes, and remarked, \u201cAnd as shy as you were in school, I\u2019m sure it hasn\u2019t been easy. But you did it, Radford. Kudos.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cColor me right flattered and deeply touched,\u201d he replied, getting lost in her hazel green eyes.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAnd, honey, as close as trouble shadows me, I figure it couldn\u2019t hurt to have a good lawyer buddy.\u201d She giggled.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAt your service.\u201d He bowed and presented his card.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, this one\u2019ll definitely go on the refrigerator.\u201d She laughed.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cSo how about you, Camellia? Please enlighten me with all the exciting adventures in Camellialand.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0 \u201cWhew. There\u2019ve been more than a few.\u201d She widened her eyes with an exaggerated sigh before taking his elbow to lead them downhill toward the forest.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cBut this scene\u2019s too claustrophobic,\u201d she remarked with a raised eyebrow. \u201cSo let\u2019s skedaddle to where it\u2019s a whole lot roomier. I grew up in this neighborhood and we used to play in these woods all the time. With a full moon and clear sky, we\u2019ll have no trouble seeing the trails.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 An awed Radford reminded himself he was not dreaming. Initially worried what their classmates would think, he soon realized he was getting a charge from it. Indeed, Radford became completely captivated as he and Camellia explored a host of trails amidst gobs of trees lit by a full June moon and starry sky. The thick forest glowed in the summer twilight, enhanced by the dance of flickering fireflies, the competing scents of various blooms, and a cacophony of crickets and singing songbirds. To become ensconced in such a tranquil realm with such an intriguing beauty felt as if he had been transported to Dreamville.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Miss Fitzsimmons was enormously relieved to find a classmate genuinely interested in her, and one intelligent and witty to boot. Because of her reputation at school, she hesitated even coming to the party but figured she might as well since she was staying just a couple of blocks away with her mother that weekend, and she longed to reconnect with folks not seen in years. Alas, all the aloof, stone-faced \u201cHello\u201ds, heads quickly turning away, and pronounced indifference of so many female classmates hurt far worse than she had dreaded.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But the refusal of old male friends to engage in meaningful conversation \u2013 especially a pair of former beaus \u2013 proved particularly upsetting. It pained her to see them so obviously uncomfortable around her standing next to their wives. When one ex casually told his spouse, \u201cShe was a friend in high school\u201d and the other would not even introduce her to his, Camellia had to summon all her anger to avoid breaking into tears. She saw Radford McGinniss as rescuing her from an otherwise disastrous evening.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAll those professional phonies back there were really starting to stick in my craw,\u201d she admitted. \u201cThe same stuck-up gals who never had a nice word for me still want nothing to do with me, and all the guys who I knew quite<\/em> well in school are now hitched to a bunch of cloned Stepford wives with nothing to say to me either. Shoot, I taught those boys more in one day than they\u2019ll ever learn from their proud, big-haired, airhead wives. It\u2019s one thing to have to put up with jerks and bores in school, but I\u2019ll be danged if I\u2019m gon\u2019 share space with \u2019em now.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cTheir loss, Camellia. As Oscar Wilde observed, \u2018Some cause happiness wherever they<\/p>\n go; others whenever they go.\u2019 You personify the former, and they epitomize the latter.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAw. Thanks, Raddy,\u201d she said softly and leaned into him as the music and chatter in the yard grew more distant.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cSo what\u2019s Camellia\u2019s post-high school story?\u201d a curious Radford asked as they ducked under some pink dogwood branches stretched over the trail.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell.\u201d She took a deep breath. \u201cAfter graduation, with no idea what to do other than making a fine time and staying on Momma\u2019s allowance, I went to the local university where I majored in boys. Now I was an A+ student in that course, but I flunked out of the classes you actually had to attend and write papers for instead of just flirty notes or \u2018Dear John\u2019 letters. I shoulda\u2019 asked you to tutor me.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cMaybe you should\u2019ve majored in male psychology.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAin\u2019t much to that.\u201d She retorted. \u201cBesides, I had no use for most of those excuses for professors I suffered through \u2013 a bunch of low-T, beta soy boys and angry women constantly jonesing to be \u2018outraged.\u2019 As soon as a lot of lectures began, I\u2019d think, \u2018Okay, here comes the bitchkrieg.\u2019 I reckon there\u2019s a whole mess of mighty proud virgins in that racket. But some of the students were even worse. So much of the campus was just a reality-distortion zone for bitter neurotics.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThe trick is to jump through the required hoops and get out as soon as you can with your common sense and values intact,\u201d he remarked.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cShug, I assure you those clowns never changed me, and I sure had fun too.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI never doubted you, babe.\u201d Radford grinned, surprised how comfortable he felt by her side. She patted his back and smiled at him.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cSo after getting the college passport stamped,\u201d Camellia continued as they walked around a large white pine tree, \u201cI asked myself what job would get me outta\u2019 town the fastest, see the world, and meet lots of well-heeled guys. So I became a stewardess for Delta.”<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWaouh! Tres bien, mademoiselle.\u201d Radford enthused.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cVraiment, monsieur. Merci. I flew all over the states and worked my way up to the Asian and European routes. It was a real rush getting to tour every exotic city I\u2019d ever pined for \u2013 oh, Paris je t\u2019aime! — and a whole lot more. Plus, I got courted by some pretty cool pilots which was a blast. But eventually I got sick of being a waitress in the sky, especially as passengers got more demanding and I dared to refuse to take any crap from them.”<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou? Camellia Fitzsimmons? I\u2019m flabbergasted.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou remember me well,\u201d she noted and lit a Nat Sherman Fantasia cigarette. \u201cSo I left the air to work in public relations. They like to put my picture in ads, and I\u2019m good buttering up businessmen doing contract work with Delta.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cImagine that,\u201d he said with a wry smile as she grinned and punched his shoulder.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m based in Atlanta which is fine since I got tired of all the traveling. Buckhead\u2019s nice. I have a good time.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAny mighty lucky men blessed to have been your beau?\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAw, ain\u2019t you a sweetie,\u201d she remarked and gently elbowed him as Radford enjoyed how, though enveloped by tall trees, their faces still clearly stood out in the moonlight. The party\u2019s music became ever feinter, and their classmates\u2019 voices could no longer be heard.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell,\u201d she continued, \u201ca bunch of fellows may have been blessed to have me, but I don\u2019t know how \u2018blessed\u2019 I was with any of them. Alas, my romantic history has been something of a \u2018Long and Winding Road.\u2019\u201d She took a drag off her cigarette.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cA sister Beatles fan.\u201d He beamed at her as she smiled at him. \u201cHow I wish I\u2019d known,\u201d he exclaimed. \u201cMaybe I would\u2019ve gotten the nerve to try to talk with you at school.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAnd now you\u2019re making up for it.\u201d She leaned into him as he looked up at the moon and stars, still mildly incredulous to be traversing an enchanted forest with the most alluring lady he had ever known.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cCamellia, I think an airline pilot counts as quite a catch,\u201d he offered.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, they definitely knew how to wine and dine me,\u201d she conceded, \u201cand we did make some terrific times. But they were all married and either wouldn\u2019t leave the wife or I didn\u2019t cotton to become Miss Stepmom.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHave there been no decent guys who weren\u2019t pilots … or married?\u201d He barely suppressed a laugh and she elbowed him a little harder with a grin as they came upon a creek and began following it downstream.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cNot really. I mean, most were full of flash and fun, but nothing enduring, and I now realize that was my own fault. I\u2019ll put it this way. My rap sheet of bad boy beaus got so long that I even switched teams a few years back.\u201d She exhaled smoke and looked at him with a sly smile. Seeing his furrowed brow, she bent forward with a giggle.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYour innocence makes you all the cuter, Raddy. Though you\u2019re still a tad na\u00efve for a lawyer, no matter how small the town.\u201d She chuckled with a raised eyebrow. \u201cAhem. I figured since the straight road wasn\u2019t leading me anywhere, why not veer off onto the dyke path?\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou went down a path to a dike?\u201d He appeared confused as she stopped and looked at him. At last unable to hide his grin, she tickled his belly.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cBravo.\u201d She nodded. \u201cI bet you\u2019ve got a real fine poker face in court too.\u201d He winked at her.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cSo are you … still on \u2018the dyke path\u2019?\u201d he asked with a look of concern.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201c\u2018Fear not,\u2019 thy fine heterosexual man,\u201d she trumpeted before he took her hand to help her step over a large tree that had fallen across the creek. After they climbed over it, he kept hold of her hand. When he looked at her face, she continued talking as if nothing had happened.\u00a0Oh, if my ninth-grade self could see me now, what hope that would have given me<\/em>, he reflected. What a whole new outlook on life that could have spawned<\/em>.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI mean, don\u2019t get me wrong,\u201d she qualified herself. \u201cI had some pleasant times with chicks and, unlike most guys, none ever cheated on me\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThat you know<\/em> of. I\u2019ve handled some divorce cases and, trust me, all kinds of fascinating information can \u2013 and usually does \u2013 come out,\u201d he interjected.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cPoint well taken, dear, and I\u2019ll withdraw the remark about your naivete.\u201d She kicked a pine cone into the creek. \u201cBut there was just so much more\u00a0drama<\/em> with chicks. Ugh. The endless<\/em> analyzing of\u00a0every<\/em>\u00a0little thing. Too many emotional ups and downs. Imagine all the normal mood swings with a typical chick but\u00a0doubled<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cNo thanks,\u201d he said shaking his head and waving a hand before holding her arm as they stepped onto some wet rocks gleaming in the moonlight at the water\u2019s edge.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI mean, no offense, babe,\u201d she asserted. \u201cBut men are so simple. As Mae West said, \u2018Men are like linoleum floors. Lay \u2019em right and you can walk all over them for years.\u2019 Mae\u2019s my spirit guide.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Chuckling, he asked, \u201cBut was the relative lack of emotional turmoil the only thing you missed about guys?\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAhhh. Ever the smooth and subtle one, Mr. Attorney.\u201d She smiled at him. \u201cThe sex\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cNow I wasn\u2019t necessarily referring to that,\u201d he interrupted.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOh, yes, you were.\u201d She smiled. \u201cThat smooth lawyer schtick can work in court, but you can\u2019t fool me, babe,\u201d she announced before inhaling her cigarette. \u201cHooking up with chicks was still a good time, but it just never had the oompf of getting it on with guys. It was pleasing enough, sure, but it always felt incomplete. I mean, the first time I hooked up with a guy, I was like, this is\u00a0it!<\/em> But after each roll with a gal, it was always,\u00a0this<\/em>\u00a0is it? Something was always missing. Acceptable, but like a roller coaster ride with no hills and thrills, a pizza with no pepperoni, or a barbeque sandwich with no meat.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cPun intended?\u201d He looked at her with raised eyebrows.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHey, Mr. Innocent got that,\u201d she replied grinning.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Scratching the top of his head, he gave his best Stan Laurel smile. \u201cSo,\u201d he began, \u201cafter you got back on the straight and narrow heterosexual path, did you finally find a good man? Ever get close to marrying anyone?\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 After a pause while he admired the moonlit waters of the winding creek cradled by overhanging branches, he turned to her. \u201cOnly one,\u201d she finally answered with a faraway voice and the slightest sigh before looking at the stars, taking a drag on her cigarette, and tossing it in the water.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Realizing he could barely hear the party\u2019s music and seeing her stare at the ground with a serious face amidst another long pause, he squeezed her hand. \u201cCamellia, I\u2019m sorry if I touched a nerve.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t be,\u201d she remarked and patted his hand. \u201cThere was one fellow \u2013 just one, mind you \u2013 who I actually thought I might spend my life with. He was one of only two guys I ever lived with and the only one I even gave up my own place for. We were both twenty-eight and just completely clicked, guessing each other\u2019s thoughts, finishing the other\u2019s sentences, always wanting to do the same things \u2013 well, almost<\/em> always. He could be so funny too, was wicked smart, and really successful \u2013 the computer programmer for a good-sized business. Never even looked at another gal, and truly loved me.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHe sounds dreamy,\u201d Radford observed as she lit another cigarette.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHe was,\u201d she remarked wistfully while exhaling smoke. \u201cBut since nobody\u2019s perfect, I suppose he had to have at least one flaw too, right? Well, as great as his virtues were, I guess his downside had to be big as well, and it was. He abused drugs.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOh, I\u2019m very sorry,\u201d Radford remarked as she gave him a fleeting forced smile.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYeah, me too,\u201d she lamented before taking a drag. \u201cHe thought he could handle them, and he convinced me. I mean, he was fully functional doing all that complex computer crap for a large firm and still able to smoke as much weed and snort as much blow as he pleased. I still thought he did too much and told him so. But then I was partying with him too, just not nearly as hard. What I didn\u2019t know is that he was also doing heroin.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWow,\u201d Radford murmured.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYeah,\u201d she agreed. \u201cBut dog if he wasn\u2019t still able to keep juggling it all, and right to the very end. My year living with him was the happiest I\u2019d ever been.\u201d She took another hit off her cigarette. \u201cAnd then I woke up one morning, reached over, and felt this cold blob.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Radford stopped to face her while she stared at the water. \u201cHe was dead,\u201d she said evenly.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOh, Camellia. I\u2019m ever so sorry. I had no idea. If you\u2019d rather not–\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThanks, but no, I think it might help. I haven\u2019t talked about him with anyone in quite a while. Anyway, I called the ambulance but I knew he was gone, which the paramedics confirmed. I found his secret kit with a syringe and spoon and the whole works hidden in a shoebox in his closet. I had no idea he was on smack. So he ultimately fooled me too.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She steered them down another path and soon they entered a moon-lit meadow where the stars seemed to shine more brightly to illuminate the pine, oak, and dogwood trees surrounding them.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAnd before the shock could even wear off, that\u2019s when the nightmare really began,\u201d she continued in a louder, angrier voice. \u201cThere was a police investigation and I got questioned \u2013 grilled, more like it \u2013 I don\u2019t know how many times. It made the papers and I had to get lawyered up. If I\u2019d a-known you were a lawyer, you sure woulda\u2019 heard from me. Anyway, there was weed, coke, and smack in the house, but because Seth\u2019s was the only name on the lease, I passed all the drug tests \u2013 thank God — and had no track marks, plus the district attorney felt sorry for me losing my boyfriend, he didn\u2019t prosecute me for possession.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThank Heaven for that,\u201d he observed.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cIndeed. It definitely got me to stop using drugs. That\u2019s for dang sure, all except for my trusty coffin nails.\u201d She inhaled again.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cCamellia, did you get some support from anyone in all this mess?\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cMom helped, some. She did, though not without ragging on me again about still being \u2018a bum magnet\u2019 getting involved with \u2018a druggie.\u2019\u201d Sighing heavily, \u201cAnd I guess that\u2019s fair. But what do you do when everything else about someone just seems so right and you love him \u2013 maybe even more because you know he\u2019s messed up and you want to help him?\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI sure hope his family was grateful to you for sticking with him to the end,\u201d Radford remarked.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHa! They hated me. Well, his siblings were okay. They knew what an addict their brother was and that I was actually a stabilizing force, which is kinda\u2019 funny. But his parents were in total denial about him \u2013 and to be fair, I guess I was, too, to some extent. Still, they actually blamed me<\/em> for his death. They had the gall to claim I<\/em> got him to use all those drugs and then did nothing until it was too late the night he died. They even threatened to sue me.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOh, Camellia,\u201d he said putting his arm around her. She leaned her head on his shoulder as they stopped in the middle of the field.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cFor a long time, I blamed myself too, for not waking up in time.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cCamellia, that\u2019s utterly unreasonable. Please believe me,\u201d he implored. \u201cHe<\/em> was the heroin-user, not you. You didn\u2019t even know about it. And, as savvy as I think you are, he sure must have gone to a whole heap of trouble to hide it from you too. And you were asleep<\/em> that night. Plus, he was a big boy. Twenty-eight, no less. It had long been his responsibility to man up and face his problem. Not to be mean, but he was hardly considerate hiding such an addiction from you.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYeah, my Prince Charming wasn\u2019t so just right after all. Still, it hurt so<\/em> bad, Radford \u2013 the worst pain of my life — and, when I think about it, it still does.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOf course,\u201d he stated and gave her a full hug which she eagerly returned and would not relinquish. He wished he knew the words to offer the most solace, but was at a loss. Nothing was said for a couple of minutes as they continued holding each other. Illuminated by a cloudless moon, he cherished the azaleas, gardenias, and honeysuckle vines all around them in full bloom. How he relished their competing aromas and the high-pitched chorus of chirping birds and crickets. Is this the most surreal moment of my life?<\/em> he mused.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Though feeling slightly guilty, he was overwhelmed by a powerful sense of warmth and recalled his last hot bath years before when recovering from minor surgery. But now he felt so much affection and what he wanted to believe was a genuine connection. He had never gotten so close to someone in so short a time.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When she quietly began to weep, he gently stroked her head and back, still struggling to find the right words. She shivered and drew him tighter.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 As awful as it was recalling her life\u2019s worst chapter, Camellia felt better having shared her anguish. She also figured a lot of the present pain was fueled by how deeply disappointed and hurt she was by several classmates at the party, especially ex-boyfriends.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But her spirits had soared with Radford as she was thrilled to sense a close bond with someone, particularly a man since she had not dated anyone in many months, a record for her. That everything was happening so fast with a person she barely noticed in school was all the stranger yet still both exciting and refreshingly comforting. Unlike other dating relationships that had progressed suddenly, it was a significant relief knowing that, should this become a romance, she was with someone she harbored no misgivings about. Ever since her nightmare ending with Seth, this requirement was non-negotiable.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cCamellia,\u201d Radford began, \u201cas terrible as the tragic ending of that relationship was, it\u2019s over and will only grow ever dimmer as it fades ever further in your rearview mirror. But that doesn\u2019t take away any of the good times and even joy you got to share with someone really special for a whole year. I know it\u2019s real easy for me to say this, and maybe it\u2019ll take years for you to accept, but how many folks ever find anyone with whom they\u2019re so simpatico? At least you\u2019ll always have that.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThanks, Raddy.\u201d She kissed his cheek and he handed her his handkerchief.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI promise it\u2019s not used,\u201d he assured her. \u201cI brought a fresh one for the party,\u201d prompting her to laugh and pat his chest.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re even funny when you don\u2019t mean to be.\u201d She smiled at him. \u201cOr maybe you did. I gotta\u2019 keep reminding myself you\u2019re a shrewd lawyer now. Either way, I appreciate it \u2026 a lot.\u201d After wiping her face and blowing her nose, she sighed and hugged him again.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYeah, it was the shock and awe of Seth\u2019s death that hurled me right into the Land of Lesbos,\u201d she remarked.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Feeling his muscles contract as he stifled a laugh, she tickled his sides and pulled her head back to smile at him.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d he said. \u201cThe deadpan way you say some things can come off as pretty funny, whether intentional or not. Please forgive me, Camellia.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cNo need,\u201d she said putting her finger to his lips. \u201cShoot, without some humor, actually a whole lot of humor, I doubt I\u2019d-a gotten this far.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWhat an uplifting attitude. I expect you\u2019re wise well beyond your years, young Miss Fitzsimmons.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, sometimes I feel like I\u2019ve already done more living in 33 years than a lot of folks over a whole lifetime.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cBully for Miss Camellia, as Teddy Roosevelt would say,\u201d he remarked.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI bet you win the trivia contests at bars too,\u201d she remarked.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cActually, I can\u2019t remember when I last visited a bar\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOf course not,\u201d she interrupted with a chuckle and took his hand to lead them back toward the party. They were soon walking along the creek again and he wondered if he had blown it by not trying to kiss her in the clearing when everything seemed ideal but for her getting emotional. Though still not very experienced romantically, he was somewhat confident she would reciprocate his advances, but part of him felt like the awkward nerd daring to make a move on the hottest girl in school. Walking up the creek, he worried her silence signaled disappointment.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Why won\u2019t he at least kiss me?<\/em> she asked herself. With the party\u2019s music getting louder, she grew anxious and almost resigned he would not. As smart as he is and a lawyer, can he really be so thick? Or maybe he\u2019s not really into me and just feels sorry for me. Have we merely entered Friendville? Making out in the middle of that meadow would have been so romantic, though he may have felt weird making a move when I\u2019d just been crying. But I\u2019ve already hugged and kissed him, and we\u2019re holding hands! How many more hints does he need?<\/em><\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When they got to a section of the creek where the embankment was several feet high, he gently pulled her away from it and switched places so he would be walking near the edge. She stopped, looked at him, and smiled.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWhat?\u201d he asked, blinking. She gave no reply but held his eyes, turned her head a little sideways, and widened her smile.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 With the moon highlighting her face and a mild breeze moving some stray strands of her hair, he returned her smile and stepped forward to kiss and embrace her. As she enveloped him in her arms, she felt his tongue slowly slide into her mouth and his hands begin massaging her back. She cupped his head in her hands and was struck by how gentle and patient he was, determined to discover her entire mouth but not in the least hurried. After several minutes he began kissing her cheeks, chin, neck, and forehead. She loved how slowly but surely he kissed her whole face, all the while his soft hands were rubbing her back and then exploring her thick, curly hair. It was worth the wait<\/em>, she concluded.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Radford was elated with the most satisfying kiss of his life. Not only was he making out with the prettiest lady he had ever known, but one who eagerly welcomed each new kiss with more passion than he had ever received. He was startled and excited when she briefly clasped her teeth around his tongue while tickling his behind, and he became thrilled when she put her hands under his shirt to run her fingers over his bare back before squeezing it. He reciprocated and got a charge hearing her moan. When he felt her hips, she smiled and did the same to his.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They finally caught their breath together, prompting Camellia to rest her head on his chest giggling and tickling him. He soon put his forehead against hers to nuzzle her nose, eliciting a grin. With his arms resting on her shoulders, they held each other\u2019s eyes and smiled. Each noticed more birds singing, bullfrogs croaking, and the hushed sound of running water. Neither wanted the moment to pass and both saw no need for words. Radford put his hands around her back to draw her closer and she buried her head in his chest. Nothing was said for a time as each luxuriated in the other\u2019s warmth and affection. At last, Mr. McGinniss could contain himself no longer.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cCamellia, I know I\u2019m far from the most experienced guy around, but I\u2019d be an ingrate if I didn\u2019t thank you for the most wonderful make-out session of my life.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Sporting a big grin, she leaned her head back and placed her hands on his cheeks. Camellia blinked and displayed what Radford thought was the most blissful smile he had ever seen.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, without going into detail, let\u2019s just say I\u2019m likely far more experienced than you, and I can confidently say this has been the most satisfying kiss of my life too. Thanks, Raddy.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Just as he was about to express his awe, she fingered his belly button which prompted him to laugh and reflexively jump back.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAha! And I finally found where you\u2019re ticklish too,\u201d she bragged and stepped forward to tickle him some more.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHey! Hey! Let\u2019s not fall into the creek,\u201d he exclaimed while enveloping her to move them several feet from the water.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWouldn\u2019t that give \u2019em something to gossip about if we returned to the party drenched?\u201d She bent forward cackling.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHmm, I don\u2019t cotton to getting soaked in this night air and driving home all wet,\u201d he declared. \u201cBut I wouldn\u2019t mind the gossip. In fact, truth be told, this nerd would be thrilled to be linked with the most beautiful gal in the whole class.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAw. You\u2019re mighty sweet, Mr. Raddy,\u201d she replied and kissed him again a long time until the strongest wind of the evening came over the creek and she nestled her head against his chest.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAlas, it\u2019s not only getting late but slightly chilly,\u201d he noted as they began the trek back to Belle Boyd\u2019s back yard, albeit much more slowly with their arms around each other\u2019s waist and her head against his right shoulder.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cPlease lead me on the correct path back since I haven\u2019t been thinking straight for some time now,\u201d he remarked, prompting her to chuckle.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t rightly know if I want to,\u201d she replied. \u201cI haven\u2019t been thinking much at all lately. Do I really want to re-enter the rest of the world again? I\u2019m awful stoked just sharing these lovely woods with you.\u201d She looked at him and he stopped to kiss, hold her, and play with her hair.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI worry that when we leave these woods,\u201d he confided, \u201cI\u2019m going to find out this was all just a dream, like when I used to fantasize about you in high school.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, let me prove it\u2019s not, Raddy.\u201d She provided another prolonged kiss.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When they resumed walking, nothing was said. He felt a mysterious mix of being thrilled and yet radiantly relaxed, so warm and calm but with an undercurrent of excitement, all magnified by a profound sense that all was well. He determined to do whatever he could to make this feeling last as long as possible.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She was amazed and euphoric that what had begun as one of the worst nights of her life had suddenly evolved into one of the most charming. Having lost hope of ever making a strong connection with another person only made the evening feel still more incredible. Enhancing the exhilaration of this new romance was its being shared with someone stable, reliable, and truly appreciative and respectful of her. This is the first man I can take home to Mom without the slightest worry<\/em>, she assured herself.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 As the music became much louder and they heard people jumping in the pool, Camellia and Radford focused on their moonlit shadows on the path ahead adjacent to the creek. When they emerged from the woods into Belle\u2019s back yard, there were a lot fewer classmates present, and several ladies were in the pool cheering as guys vied for who could make the most impressive jump off the diving board.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 With the new couple\u2019s arms draped around each other walking uphill to the pool, several people turned to them. Radford initially looked at the grass now lit by an outdoor light before lifting his head and smiling. Camellia appeared quite contented and walked a little slower. A male classmate to Radford\u2019s left grinned and gave him a thumbs-up.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThere<\/em> y\u2019all are,\u201d Belle declared in her bathing suit putting a towel about her shoulders. \u201cI was wondering what happened to y\u2019all. But I reckon everything\u2019s all right after all.\u201d She chuckled slightly.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cBeaucoups of thanks for such a lovely party, Belle,\u201d Radford said. \u201cIn fact, I shall be forever grateful to you.\u201d Camellia grinned at him as Belle giggled and gave him a hug and a kiss.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cDitto, dear,\u201d Camellia said as she kissed and hugged their hostess. \u201cI just thank you so much for never ostracizing me, Belle. You\u2019ve always been kind, and I appreciate that more than you\u2019ll ever know.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cOh, sweetie. You just made my evening,\u201d Belle noted and hugged her again. \u201cOh, and I\u2019m sorry I\u2019m wet!\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s all swell, girl,\u201d Camellia replied.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The pair said goodbye to several folks as they made their way to the street.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cSince you\u2019re staying with your momma so close by, I \u2019spect you just walked here, Miss Fitzsimmons. But I\u2019d be right happy to give you a ride home in the cherry chariot,\u201d he stated, pointing to his deep red car before them.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWell, I\u2019d be right proud if you did, Mr. McGinniss,\u201d she proclaimed with an exaggerated southern drawl as he opened the door for her.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Little was said as they made the short trip to her mother\u2019s house and pulled into the driveway. He turned off the ignition and looked at her, not knowing what to say.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThis is so like high school,\u201d she chuckled. \u201cI\u2019m half expecting my mom to march outside hectoring me for staying out too late.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThis is nothing like my high school experience,\u201d he reflected.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAw, darling, come here,\u201d she cooed and leaned over to kiss and hold him. They held each other a while before she nuzzled his nose and stared into his eyes.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019d invite you in, but with Mom home, it\u2019d be like high school again.\u201d She laughed. \u201cPlus, I have to get up before 6 to drive to Atlanta for an early morning flight to Chicago where I\u2019m spending the day with a couple of girlfriends\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Here he widened his eyes and raised his eyebrows. \u201cPlatonic<\/em> girlfriends,\u201d she clarified. \u201cNo, I left Lesboland long ago. It was an amusing trip but I have no plans to return, especially after tonight.\u201d She gave him an exaggerated coquettish look. \u201cI\u2019ve got a Monday morning meeting at the Chicago Delta office before heading back to Atlanta. But let\u2019s exchange contact information and in a couple of days we can chat.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou got it,\u201d Radford replied. As they texted their phone numbers, he continued. \u201cIf you like, I\u2019d sure be tickled to take you to dinner next weekend. I\u2019m only a little over an hour from Atlanta.\u201d<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWhy, I\u2019d just be tickled pink,\u201d she answered.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cPowerful purty in pink,\u201d he remarked with a smile to which she leaned over for another leisurely kiss. When their lips parted, they still held each other.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t want this moment to end,\u201d he finally said.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI know! Me neither,\u201d she echoed. \u201cBut in less than a week we can pick right up where we left off.\u201d She looked him close in the eyes as she tickled his belly button again and laughed as he squirmed. She gave him a quick peck on the lips before leaving the car.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI can walk you to the front door,\u201d he offered.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s all right,\u201d she said. \u201cI suspect somebody might see us and then immediately start with endless questions when I\u2019d much rather just go straight to bed \u2026 and dream.\u201d She smiled and blew a kiss closing the car door.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Rolling down his window as she walked by, he declared, \u201cYou won\u2019t be the only one dreaming tonight \u2019cause I\u2019m gon\u2019 have to drive home on autopilot.\u201d She grinned.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAnd to think I never even tried out for the football team,\u201d he noted in a raised voice.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYeah, well, there\u2019s a whole new pecking order.\u201d She pointed at him with a wink.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" by Douglas Young \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Though slightly nervous, Radford McGinniss caught himself smiling en route to a fifteenth annual high\u00a0school reunion thrown at a classmate\u2019s home Saturday evening. Despite his four years at Theophilus Holmes High being his most miserable, littered with the usual adolescent angst and aggravated by a severe strain of shyness, Radford still […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1781,77],"tags":[1565,1782,1123],"class_list":["post-15786","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-egophobia-85","category-english","tag-douglas-young","tag-egophobia-85","tag-english"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DakB-46C","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15786","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=15786"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15786\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15787,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15786\/revisions\/15787"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=15786"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=15786"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=15786"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}