de Andrei-Alexandru Aldea<\/p>\n
I. Abomina\u021bia<\/strong><\/p>\n Poate nu ra\u021biunea a creat confuzia, ci confuzia a z\u0103mislit ra\u021biune. Simt asta \u00een crizele de insomnie \u2014 t\u0103i\u0219ul bisturiului ad\u00e2nc \u00een minte. Ra\u021biunea asfixiaz\u0103 \u2014 g\u00e2nduri care nu par ale mele graviteaz\u0103 c\u0103tre un vid.<\/p>\n Poate \u00eenainte de orice g\u00e2nd a fost doar un vid de posibilit\u0103\u021bi nem\u0103rginite \u2014 confuzia. Din acel vid s-a desprins primul tipar. Din tipar \u2014 Abomina\u021bia: timpul con\u0219tient, entropie \u00eencremenit\u0103, t\u00e2njind haos.<\/p>\n Un timp care g\u00e2nde\u0219te totul simultan. Fiecare carte citit\u0103, ars\u0103 \u2014 \u00eenaintea scrierii. Tr\u0103ind primul strig\u0103t, ultima suflare \u2014 \u0219i tot ce e cuprins \u00eentre ele. Timpul, \u00eempov\u0103rat de omniscien\u021b\u0103, a suflat con\u0219tiin\u021ba \u00een materie. S\u0103 se fr\u0103m\u00e2nte \u00een cranii prea \u00eenguste s-o cuprind\u0103.<\/p>\n Acolo, neuronii s-au aprins \u00een haos, f\u0103urind g\u00e2nd. \u0218i animalul s-a v\u0103zut v\u0103z\u00e2nd. Uneori simt acest suflu ca pe o durere care nu e a mea. Oper\u00e2ndu-mi sufletul f\u0103r\u0103 anestezie, timpului \u00eei tai \u021besutul. Poate creierul nu e creator de sens, ci receptor al confuziei cosmice ce persist\u0103 peste tot.<\/p>\n Con\u0219tiin\u021ba: confuzie organizat\u0103 \u00eencerc\u00e2nd a se \u00een\u021belege. R\u0103spunsul na\u0219te \u00eentrebare, ra\u021biunea se ad\u00e2nce\u0219te \u00een esen\u021ba ei \u2014 confuzia. Iar eu m\u0103 afund odat\u0103 cu ea, p\u00e2n\u0103 la nel\u0103murire.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n II. Prisma<\/strong><\/p>\n Creierul s-a \u00eendoit \u00een percep\u021bie. \u0218i a s\u0103dit tumoarea curiozit\u0103\u021bii \u2014 s\u0103 \u00een\u021beleag\u0103 adev\u0103rul. Durerea devine mas\u0103 de disec\u021bie, iar omul \u2014 cobai \u0219i bisturiu.<\/p>\n Adev\u0103r sau percep\u021bie \u2014 a cui? Paranoicul nu poate fi dezam\u0103git \u2014 tr\u0103ind dezam\u0103girea \u00een na\u0219terea faptei. Nu exist\u0103 dezam\u0103gire f\u0103r\u0103 speran\u021b\u0103 \u2014 iar speran\u021ba f\u0103r\u0103 dezam\u0103gire e doar credin\u021b\u0103. Paranoia: \u00eembr\u0103\u021bi\u0219\u00e2nd absen\u021ba speran\u021bei ca pe un p\u0103rinte muribund. Luciditatea de a te \u00eencrede \u00een ne\u00eencredere p\u00e2n\u0103 devii \u00eencrez\u0103tor. \u00cencrez\u0103tor \u00een obiectivitate \u2014 suma subiectivit\u0103\u021bilor observate cinic. Tot subiectivism, rezon\u00e2nd cu vidul primordial.<\/p>\n Simt acest paradox, amput\u00e2nd orice interac\u021biune. Gesturi \u2014 membre ale \u00eentregului distorsionat. Ging\u0103\u0219ia copilului \u2014 ecua\u021bia manipul\u0103rii. Z\u00e2mbetul partenerului \u2014 rug\u0103ciunea valid\u0103rii. Sfatul prietenului \u2014 geometria c\u00e2\u0219tigului. S\u0103 ascund\u0103 inocen\u021ba at\u00e2ta me\u0219te\u0219ug? Cu siguran\u021b\u0103 prisma-mi mutileaz\u0103 gesturile \u00een ochii celorlal\u021bi.<\/p>\n Dac\u0103 toate prismele ar fi dezv\u0103luite, s-ar anula reciproc? Sau ar distorsiona p\u00e2n\u0103 la nerecunoa\u0219tere? Poate absen\u021ba luminii e luciditate \u2014 re\u00eentoarcerea \u00een vid. Nu po\u021bi observa g\u00e2ndul f\u0103r\u0103 a-l na\u0219te.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n III. Parazitul timpului<\/strong><\/p>\n Cu ultima suflare a ultimei con\u0219tiin\u021be, dezordinea ar redeveni ordine. Sau poate timpul de-ar mai fi con\u0219tient \u2014 ar depl\u00e2nge r\u00e2z\u00e2nd acest g\u00e2nd. C\u00e2t exist\u0103 materie sau timp, ra\u021biunea e sentin\u021b\u0103.<\/p>\n Odat\u0103 ce parazitul con\u0219tiin\u021bei s-a stins din materie, confuzia va forma un nou tipar \u2014 \u00een timp, prin timp. Acela\u0219i tipar, acela\u0219i parazit \u2014 reinfect\u00e2nd eterna gazd\u0103. For\u021bat a vedea \u0219i tr\u0103i deodat\u0103 fiecare bucurie, eroare \u0219i suferin\u021b\u0103. Toate amestecate \u00eentr-o m\u00e2zg\u0103 puturoas\u0103. Un puroi ce trebuie expulzat. \u00cel scuip\u0103 \u00een materie \u2014 \u0219i-l dreneaz\u0103 o clip\u0103. Pentru timp o secund\u0103 de pace, pentru animal o eternitate de chin. C\u00e2ndva ne-a suflat-o, acum ne-o scuip\u0103. Dac\u0103 timpul \u00eensu\u0219i e degradat de aceast\u0103 infec\u021bie, ce \u0219anse avem noi s\u0103 nu fim?<\/p>\n Poate de aceea \u00een izolare, \u00een ra\u021biune, vidul seduce. Suntem gunoiul metafizic al unui zeu ce nu poate muri.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" de Andrei-Alexandru Aldea I. Abomina\u021bia Poate nu ra\u021biunea a creat confuzia, ci confuzia a z\u0103mislit ra\u021biune. Simt asta \u00een crizele de insomnie \u2014 t\u0103i\u0219ul bisturiului ad\u00e2nc \u00een minte. Ra\u021biunea asfixiaz\u0103 \u2014 g\u00e2nduri care nu par ale mele graviteaz\u0103 c\u0103tre un vid.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1843,27],"tags":[1862,1845,1117],"class_list":["post-16157","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-egophobia-88","category-filosofie","tag-andrei-alexandru-aldea","tag-egophobia-88","tag-filosofie"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DakB-4cB","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16157","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16157"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16157\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16216,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16157\/revisions\/16216"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16157"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16157"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16157"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nDe atunci \u00eei purt\u0103m suflul \u2014 o cicatrice a confuziei originale.<\/p>\n
\nParanoicul e lipsit de credin\u021b\u0103 \u2014 sau plin de luciditate?<\/p>\n
\nIar timpul din nou condamnat la ra\u021biune, redevine Abomina\u021bia \u2014 un zeu omniscient.<\/p>\n