{"id":7013,"date":"2011-05-30T10:00:48","date_gmt":"2011-05-30T08:00:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/egophobia.ro\/?p=7013"},"modified":"2011-07-01T10:28:31","modified_gmt":"2011-07-01T08:28:31","slug":"cat-eyes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/?p=7013","title":{"rendered":"Cat Eyes"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Robert Fenhagen <\/a>(USA)<\/em><\/p>\n

pentru versiunea rom\u00e2n\u0103 click aici<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Staring into the Siamese cat\u2019s eyes, I imagined things that made me wonder if I were going crazy.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou have been marching for years.\u00a0 Have you any ideas as to where you are marching to?\u201d asked the cat.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

And<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI am well versed in your habits, both good and bad.\u00a0 Why do practicing ones\u2019s bad habits appeal to humans, and why can\u2019t you people talk to one another?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I stared at the cool blue-gray eyes\u2014so intelligent and aloof.\u00a0 I blinked, as did the cat.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Sitting in my friend\u2019s living room, the cat\u2019s eyes were so intelligent!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I loved<\/em> this girl, but was all about her cat at the moment.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I shook my head.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe stupid cat was a cat<\/em> for Christ\u2019s sake!\u00a0 Get it together\u201d, I thought. I always yell at myself worse than most people yell at people they hate, or so it seemed.\u00a0\u00a0 I could be brutal\u2014at least to myself.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Was this Siamese devil-cat speaking to me, or was I just channeling my own inner thoughts onto the cat?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Of course, the cat wasn\u2019t speaking to me– it couldn\u2019t, but I was hearing something<\/em>.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What is a cat anyway? A mammal, right?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A warm blooded animal — a mirror to my soul?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

She and I are mammals, too.\u00a0 Our blood is warm\u2014oh, never mind\u2026<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Please, knock it off, me.\u00a0 Lisa and I would remain friends.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I looked into this animal\u2019s eyes\u2014their color appeared to vary from cobalt blue to soft gray at times, and then at other times, I just saw the sunshine reflected in those eyes, those exquisite, beautiful, intelligent eyes.\u00a0 So serene, and so, so knowing all that they beheld.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I felt so insignificant.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My friend walked through the living room, asking if I was ok.\u00a0 I smiled and nodded.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhy do you look so sad?\u00a0 You have no reason to be.\u00a0 Relax.\u201d (I was so attracted to her, but was too stupidly shy to make a move.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Shaking my head, I looked around the small apartment.\u00a0 Books and books lined one of the baby-scarred, pale green walls, and used-furniture store table (which wobbled) stood wobbly and splintered around \u00a0the tiny room.\u00a0 She had a cheap plastic table cloth with fishing scenes on it. Such were her decorating skills.\u00a0 Money talks and decorating walks.\u00a0 She had no money, but was rich in gentleness.\u00a0 She was special in ways I had never known existed.\u00a0 I dreamed about her\u2014the person, not the cat.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Otherwise, my girl\u2019s life was made up of uncertainties.\u00a0 Economics were foreign subjects to her.\u00a0 I love her.\u00a0 I never considered it before, but, actually, I was pretty well-off–funny I hadn\u2019t thought about that before.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Not her cat, though, that was for sure. No economic crap for this cat, no sir. \u00a0Her cat seemed more than happy to relax serenely on the upper edge of the cat clawed, threadbare couch, and watching humans as we dithered about.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I couldn\u2019t hear if it was purring, but it looked utterly at peace with the world as it sat, and watched.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know how the hell I\u2019m going to pay the rent.\u00a0 I just don\u2019t know.\u201d Spoke my friend.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I looked up, away from the cat\u2019s intense stare, and softly replied:<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSomething has to break.\u00a0 Something will come along.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The cat blinked and it stroked its beige fur.\u00a0 The cat\u2019s reaction to my caress was almost sexual.\u00a0 Sensual, that\u2019s what it was.\u00a0 The cat blinked again.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhy don\u2019t you speak to her, perhaps with your heart?\u201d\u00a0 The cat blinked again.\u00a0 Intelligent blue and gray eyes looking at me and gone as the cat blinked.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I got up from the couch, patting a gray and black checked throw pillow, and tossing it where I been sitting. I felt glad to be there\u2014hell, I was happy to be anywhere around this woman and her crazy cat, but I also felt uncomfortable in her place.\u00a0 She is a very intelligent person, who wasn\u2019t interested in things that drove many people, namely paying bills on time and vacuuming, but if we\u00a0 got into a conversation about politics or the homeless, from capitalism to socialism, from intimacy to\u2026<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I silently chastised myself for my brain.\u00a0 Shut up, brain.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Even though I knew very well that she had been burned in the past and never would allow me beyond the friendship, I thought of being closer. Mostly, I kept my emotions in check, but between my stupid mind and this cat, I was balled up.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Why had I even come here? \u00a0Am I crazy?\u00a0 Am I a glutton for punishment?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I stepped onto a 4×6 throw rug, which was old and stained, but was really nice in a hippyish sort of way, and then went over to one of her many book shelves.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t guess where she had found such book cases\u2014they looked old, but looked new at the same time.\u00a0 Weird.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Her decorating was slip-shod at best, but she had her books in fine, deep brown wood cases that were polished impeccably.\u00a0 There was only about ten feet along one of her walls\u2014this one painted orange, but the book cases lined every available inch\u2014from the windows to the living room from which I had stepped.\u00a0 Incredible.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Volumes of psychology and self help books, novels and history books, trash and treasures stood at attention, or leaned drunkenly against one another like soldiers after an especially harrowing battle\u2014some standing straight at attention and a few leaning lazily against one another.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Running my finger along the spines of the books, I paused at one in particular.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was a thick tome, which was pink print over back binding cloth on the spine.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSeize The Day– A modern Approach to Romance\u201d.\u00a0 Pink printing captured me– that and the fact that my friend seemed to own mostly \u2018intellectual\u2019 books and this one seemed to be \u2018light\u2019–a chick-book.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

This girl was anything but a chick, or was she?\u00a0 She had the straight black hair of a Goth, but might wear jeans and tennis shoes, or a ratty men\u2019s suit\u2014too big, but really good looking on her.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I think she\u2019s beautiful.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I picked up the pink-spined book and opened it.\u00a0 A book mark fell out, so I leaned over and picked it up.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cLive Now!\u201d\u00a0 Said the bookmark in bold black on white.\u00a0 It was freshly printed, or so it seemed.\u00a0 I sighed and the cat blinked again.\u00a0 I caught it out of the corner of my eye.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I replaced the book, went to the aquarium that was overgrown with moss and was filthy, but there must have been five-hundred tiny goldfish in there.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Expecting nothing, I smiled at them.\u00a0 An occasional bubble escaped from one of them now and then, and then they were forming words.\u00a0 Of course, I thought.\u00a0 What could be more natural?\u00a0 Told you I was loosing my mind.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cShe has been watching you more than you watch her.\u00a0 Go!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I walked over to the window, which looked out on an ancient city park and looked out of the peeling fire escape, and saw a flock of geese landing in the city lake.\u00a0 Of course, soon they had formed letters:<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TALK TO HER, YOU CHICKEN<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I wrinkled my forehead\u2014I must have, even though I\u2019m 21, asked myself if she could have slipped something into the tea she\u2019d had given me.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

No, she was a health-freak to boot.\u00a0 She was so many things.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d I started, and turned; she had changed from jeans into a long, silvery gown, which showed off her wonderful and amazing <\/em>body!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I never knew she had such lovely breasts.\u00a0 And face! My gosh, she looked like an angel now, where before she looked, gosh, I can\u2019t remember what she looked like!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m looking around your apartment, that\u2019s all.\u201d \u00a0I said, trying my darnedest not to stutter.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOh, ok.\u00a0 Would you like to talk?\u201d\u00a0 She asked, smiling.\u00a0 She had really white teeth\u2014something I\u2019d never noticed\u2026.\u00a0 Dummy!<\/p>\n

And dimples.\u00a0 Where\u2019d they come from?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, sure.\u201d\u00a0 I answered as she led me to the couch. She held my hand.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The cat jumped down to land between us, and then jumped down to the rug, and was soon rubbing my leg. \u00a0Watching it, I blinked.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

End<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Robert Fenhagen (USA) pentru versiunea rom\u00e2n\u0103 click aici   Staring into the Siamese cat\u2019s eyes, I imagined things that made me wonder if I were going crazy.   \u201cYou have been marching for years.\u00a0 Have you any ideas as to where you are marching to?\u201d asked the cat.   And     \u201cI am […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[731,22],"tags":[1152,1123,25,1116],"class_list":["post-7013","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-egophobia-31","category-short-story","tag-egophobia-31","tag-english","tag-robert-fenhagen","tag-short-story"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DakB-1P7","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7013","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7013"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7013\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7274,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7013\/revisions\/7274"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7013"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7013"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7013"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}