La cin\u0103 nu s-au mai \u00eent\u00e2lnit. Ea ie\u015fise din serviciu. Era probabil acas\u0103, se g\u00e2ndea el, \u015fi se distra sau uita cu des\u0103v\u00e2r\u015fire tot ce \u0163ine de spital. M\u0103 refer, desigur, la o uitare provizorie, se lans\u0103 din nou \u00een tiradele sale savante, ce \u00ee\u015fi pierde efectul de \u00eendat\u0103 ce o nou\u0103 tur\u0103 \u00eencepe. \u00cemi \u015fi \u00eenchipui ce trebuie s\u0103 aib\u0103 loc \u00een mintea ei de fiecare dat\u0103 c\u00e2nd intr\u0103 \u00een schimb. V\u0103d totul foarte clar \u015fi fiecare am\u0103nunt e at\u00e2t de impermeabil \u00een str\u0103lucirea lui detaliat\u0103, \u00eenc\u00e2t m\u0103 orbe\u015fte \u015fi, de fapt, nu mai reu\u015fesc s\u0103 disting nimic clar. Dar \u015ftiu c\u0103 \u00een mintea ei se petrec lucruri extraordinare de c\u00e2te ori \u00ee\u015fi intr\u0103 \u00een exerci\u0163iul func\u0163iei. \u015etiu c\u0103 a\u015fa se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 \u015fi sunt at\u00e2t de sigur de ceea ce \u015ftiu, \u00eenc\u00e2t \u015ftiu p\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi c\u00e2t de sigur sunt. Impenetrabil \u015ftiu. Nu are cum s\u0103 \u00eemi scape niciun detaliu din ce mintea \u00eei deruleaz\u0103 prin fa\u0163a ochilor, numai c\u0103 nu le v\u0103d de c\u00e2t de luminoase sunt. At\u00e2ta tot. Le \u015ftiu pe toate, dar nu le pot vedea. Str\u0103lucesc prea puternic, \u00eentocmai ca opaca lumin\u0103 a dimine\u0163ii \u00een care aveam s\u0103 ne \u00eent\u00e2lnim la pr\u00e2nz. \u00cemi aduc aminte perfect. Fiecare am\u0103nunt e exact unde trebuie s\u0103 fie \u015fi nu am nicio \u00eendoial\u0103 c\u0103 a\u015fa \u015fi trebuie s\u0103 fie fiindc\u0103 \u015ftiu prea bine c\u0103 a\u015fa trebuie s\u0103 fie, \u015fi nu altfel. \u00cen niciun caz altfel. Diminea\u0163a respectiv\u0103, \u00eenc\u0103 diminea\u0163a acestei seri f\u0103r\u0103 ea, a fost extrem de luminoas\u0103. Viguros de luminoas\u0103. Am \u015fi fost surprins de c\u00e2t\u0103 sev\u0103 avea lumina \u00een acea diminea\u0163\u0103. Era pur \u015fi simplu v\u00e2noas\u0103 ca un b\u0103rbat incendiar pe care eu nu l-a\u015f putea niciodat\u0103 s\u0103 fiu, oric\u00e2t de mult a\u015f \u00eencerca s\u0103 m\u0103 schimb. Vigoarea nemai\u00eent\u00e2lnit\u0103 a luminii matinale, \u015ftiu p\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi acest detaliu aparent neimportant, devenise din ce \u00een ce mai hulpav\u0103 de \u00eentunericul nop\u0163ii precedente, pe m\u0103sur\u0103 ce \u015fi eu deveneam, cu c\u00e2t pr\u00e2nzul se \u00eendep\u0103rta de diminea\u0163\u0103, din ce \u00een ce mai hulpav. Am \u015ftiut \u015fi atunci de tandemul \u00een care eram, dar nu i-am dat importan\u0163\u0103 fiindc\u0103 eram h\u0103mesit \u015fi nu peste mult timp aveam s\u0103 o \u00eent\u00e2lnesc pe ea. S\u0103 o cunosc \u00een albul ei impermeabil… Dar oare la ce \u00eei serve\u015fte impermeabilitatea albului pe care \u00eel poart\u0103? M\u0103 \u00eentreb de ce anume ar proteja-o. Fiindc\u0103 sigur o ap\u0103r\u0103 de ceva, numai c\u0103 nu \u015ftiu \u015fi de ce. \u015etiu deja c\u0103 o ap\u0103r\u0103 de ceva, dar nu \u015ftiu \u015fi de ce anume. \u015etiu ceva, totu\u015fi. \u015etiu \u00eenceputul. Poate c\u0103 ar fi trebuit p\u00e2n\u0103 acum s\u0103 \u015ftiu \u015fi sf\u00e2r\u015fitul, dar am r\u0103bdare. Nu ies din spital at\u00e2t de repede. B\u0103taia pe care am primit-o nu m-a p\u0103r\u0103sit cu totul, de\u015fi cerul nu \u00eemi mai palpit\u0103 \u015fi nici nu mi se mai coloreaz\u0103 \u00een verdele stelelor mele preferate. \u015etiu \u015fi c\u0103 sunt aproape complet vindecat, dar \u015fi c\u0103 mai sunt \u00een convalescen\u0163\u0103. \u015etiu totul, se pare, \u015fi \u015ftiu p\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi faptul c\u0103 numai se pare c\u0103 \u015ftiu totul. Dar eu nu m\u0103 las descurajat cu una cu dou\u0103 cu trei sau cu mai multe de asemenea aparen\u0163e r\u0103ut\u0103cioase. \u015etiu c\u0103 ea mi le va \u00eendep\u0103rta din minte imediat cum ne vom vedea din nou. \u015ei cum a\u015f putea s\u0103 uit, c\u00e2nd \u015ftiu at\u00e2t de bine, de cel mai important am\u0103nunt dintre toate? Clipa \u00een care ne-am cunoscut. Venise, probabil, timpul ca ea s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eendoape ca pe un curcan, \u015ftiu c\u0103 din propria mea ini\u0163iativ\u0103, \u015fi, astfel, s\u0103 ne cunoa\u015ftem. \u00cen sf\u00e2r\u015fit. <\/p>\n
Obosise. \u00cen a\u015fteptarea cinei, intrase \u00eentr-o discu\u0163ie stufoas\u0103 cu el \u00eensu\u015fi pe care numai m\u00e2ncarea, cu aromele ei f\u0103r\u0103 niciun ecou olfactiv, reu\u015fise s\u0103 o curme. \u00cencepu s\u0103 m\u0103n\u00e2nce ad\u00e2ncit \u00een medita\u0163ie. Nu \u00eei era la fel de foame ca la pr\u00e2nz dar, ca s\u0103 nu mai ri\u015fte s\u0103 devin\u0103 din nou hulpav, se g\u00e2ndi c\u0103 nu e o idee a\u015fa de rea s\u0103 ia ceva \u00een gur\u0103 \u015fi \u00eenainte de culcare. M\u00e2nc\u0103 \u00eens\u0103 frugal \u015fi numai strictul necesar. Nici nu se g\u00e2ndea la ce m\u00e2nca. O f\u0103cea din memoria tuturor meselor pe care \u015ftia c\u0103 le luase de-a lungul \u00eentregii sale vie\u0163i. Cina pe de rost \u015fi se vede treaba c\u0103 nu uitase \u00eenc\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103n\u00e2nce corect. Totul, absolut totul din organismul s\u0103u func\u0163iona perfect \u015fi reproducea impecabil textul hr\u0103nirii. El \u00eensu\u015fi nu mai era la mas\u0103, servind cina, ci numai corpul s\u0103u pe care, \u015ftia prea bine, \u00eenc\u0103 nu putea s\u0103 \u00eel accepte ca fiind al lui, de\u015fi realitatea \u00een care c\u0103zuse nu \u00eei va mai da niciodat\u0103 \u015fansa unui alt trup. \u015etia \u015fi acest lucru cu exactitate. Se afla departe, c\u0103l\u0103torind \u00een amintirea ei recent\u0103. Cu toate c\u0103 m\u00e2nca \u015fi se uita \u0163int\u0103 la ce bag\u0103 \u00een gur\u0103 de c\u00e2te ori o deschide, privea de fapt \u00een jos, la fragmentul de banc\u0103 unde \u015fezuse ea \u015fi care \u00eei mai ardea trecerea pe deasupra lui.<\/p>\n
(va urma)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
La cin\u0103 nu s-au mai \u00eent\u00e2lnit. Ea ie\u015fise din serviciu. Era probabil acas\u0103, se g\u00e2ndea el, \u015fi se distra sau uita cu des\u0103v\u00e2r\u015fire tot ce \u0163ine de spital. M\u0103 refer, desigur, la o uitare provizorie, se lans\u0103 din nou \u00een tiradele sale savante, ce \u00ee\u015fi pierde efectul de \u00eendat\u0103 ce o nou\u0103 tur\u0103 \u00eencepe. \u00cemi […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[6,4,5],"class_list":["post-738","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-romanul-online","tag-literatura-virtuala-exclusiv-antuma","tag-patrick-calinescu","tag-roman-online"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DakB-bU","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/738","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=738"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/738\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1577,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/738\/revisions\/1577"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=738"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=738"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=738"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}